12/10/25

#231 Why we Self Sabotage when we get close to our Weight Loss Goals

Why We Self-Sabotage When We Get Close to Our Weight-Loss Goals

And How to Finally Break the Cycle

Every woman who has ever tried to lose weight knows this moment:

You’re doing well.
You feel proud.
The scales are moving…
…and then suddenly, almost out of nowhere, you stop.
Or you slip.
Or you overeat.
Or you abandon the routine that was working so well.

It feels like “self-sabotage.”
But what if it’s not?

After twenty-five years of coaching women through sustainable weight loss, I’ve learned that what we call “self-sabotage” is often something much deeper — and much more human.
In fact, it usually comes down to three powerful forces: biology, psychology, and protection.

Let’s break them down.

1. It’s Not Self-Sabotage — It’s Biology Protecting You

Your body doesn’t understand dieting culture.
It only understands survival.

If you’re eating too little or restricting too hard, your brain thinks you may be in danger. It activates ancient, hard-wired responses to protect you from famine:

• Increased hunger
• Strong cravings
• Lower energy
• Slowing metabolism
• Urges to binge

This is not a character flaw.
This is physiology.

That’s why, inside Outlook for Life, we include one weekly free meal or re-feed meal in all our programs. It

reassures your metabolism that food is available
reduces the rebound response
helps you stick to your plan long-term
keeps your mindset calm and grounded

So when you feel that urge to “blow it,” remind yourself:

“I’m not in danger. I have a free meal planned. My body is safe.”

Enjoy it, guilt-free, then slip back into your healthy routine.

2. FOMO, Restriction and the Beach Ball Effect

Women often sabotage themselves not because they lack discipline, but because they’re trying to diet in a way no human could sustain.

Too low calories.
Cutting out all your favourite foods.
White-knuckling your way through every craving.

It’s like holding a beach ball underwater — it takes all your strength to keep it down.
Eventually, you have to let go.

And when you do?
It flies out of the water.
That’s the binge.
That’s the “stuff it, I’ll start again Monday.”

The solution isn’t more discipline.
It’s a smarter, safer goal:

👉 Aim to lose 10% of your start weight over 12 weeks.

If you’re 100kg, that’s around 800g per week.
Your body will allow this without panicking, without rebound, and without that beach-ball explosion.

Focus on nourishing your body into strength — not starving yourself smaller.
Celebrate the wins that never show up on the scales:

• more energy
• calmer gut
• better sleep
• clearer mind
• strength and confidence growing week by week

3. Fear of Failure — and Fear of Success

Most women understand fear of failure.
But far fewer recognise fear of success.

Weight loss creates change.
And change can feel unsafe — especially if:

Your weight has protected you emotionally
Your body has been armour after trauma
Being smaller means being seen
Losing weight changes the dynamics in your relationship
Your identity feels tied to the struggle

I’ve coached women who feared losing weight because it attracted unwanted attention. Others who stayed overweight to feel safer in their marriage. Others who worried:

“What if I lose the weight and my life still isn’t perfect?”

These patterns are real. And they are powerful.

But once you see them, you can begin the mindset work:

🖊 journaling
🧠 questioning automatic thoughts
❤️ separating food from emotional protection
🎯 choosing to eat on purpose rather than eating from fear

Awareness is the first step toward freedom.

🟩 Breaking the Pattern — For Good

You do not self-sabotage because you’re weak.
You self-sabotage because you’re human.

When you learn:

✨ How much you can safely lose
✨ How to keep your survival mechanism calm
✨ How to build a nourishing routine
✨ How to manage your thoughts around food
✨ How to understand your emotional triggers

…everything shifts.

This is the exact work we do inside the Outlook for Life 12-Week Weight Loss Challenge starting in February.

Women lose weight without rebound.
They rebuild trust with their bodies.
They learn to eat on purpose, not from panic.
They gain confidence, strength and consistency.

If you’re ready to finally break the cycle — and step into a healthier, calmer, more powerful version of yourself —

👉 Send me a message saying “FEB CHALLENGE”, and I’ll send you the details.

Your body is not your enemy.
Your mind is not broken.
You simply need a safer, smarter, supported path.

And I’d love to guide you there.